Getting up at 4am everyday makes it hard to sleep properly. Sleep deprivation does funny things to you.
This morning either was very surreal or I have finally lost the plot.
So I wake up at 4am stumble around bleary eyed, somehow get dressed, make my slice of marmite on toast & get into my taxi.
We speed through deserted London. listening to Nilsson ‘Cant live (if living is without you)’ I’m fighting the urge to fall back asleep.
As we pull into Leicester Square I am fumbling for my cab fare when a man knocks on the window.
The taxi driver rolls the window down and the guy asks for a pound. Joe the driver politely refuses and so the guy begins to rap at us really fast. He is singing LL Cool J’s classic ‘Phenomena’.
What didn’t occur to me was I now had to walk through Leicester Square and LL Cool J the II decides to follow me rapping away.
I power walk to the door of Capital and run in. As I get to reception I am greeted by a large ensemble of giant animals. At 5am.
A Zookeeper approaches me and announces they are The Madagascan Experience from Chessington World of Adventures. Then, out of nowhere a giant terrifying thing that I thought was a raccoon (apparently it was a Lemur..?) comes up and hugs me.
I retreat upstairs to the safety of the studio, only to be informed that Usher and his entourage are here. After running around making sure they are all happy (and there were A LOT of them) and being referred to as “shortie” by ALL of them (thanks for that, Usher.) it is suddenly 10am, the show is over and my work is done.
I get home, go to sleep for a few hours and when I wake, I’m a bit puzzled. Did any of that really happen.