Pirates of the Piccadilly

The train home was packed. I was tired, grumpy and dreaming about being at home before 11pm.

I had tucked myself into a seat near the corner. Right by the door, away from the hustle and bustle of the busy carriage.

I was content. Reading my book and music being pumped into my ears.

Sadly my cosy little corner was invaded as someone sat in the seat next to me.

He had slicked back hair and was wearing a long, fitted coat. It looked a bit like a pirate’s coat.

I ignored him at first, burying my head further into my book. Suddenly I felt his face really near mine. When I say really near, I mean right next to my face. Almost cheek to cheek.

I froze as I looked in the tube window opposite to see this situation was a reality in the reflection in the glass. I also noted this gentleman had a big hoop in his ear. Maybe he really was a pirate.

I tried to lean away but this was the problem with my tiny corner. I had NO WHERE to go.

He stayed with his head next to mine for what felt like hours. Then to my horror began to sing along very loudly to “Benny and the Jets” which is what I happened to be listening to.

By this point my face was the colour of a beet root. Our fellow passengers were staring at us.

Matters only got worse when pirate-boy swung round to the rest of the carriage shouting out “BENNAAAY! BENNAAAY! BENNAAAY AND THE JEEEETS! Everybody now!”

Out of nowhere three drunk men in rugby shirts appeared and joined in.


Pirate-boy was on his knees in front of me facing his new audience throwing his arms around. I had turned my iPod off long before.
And he was still going.

As we pulled into Oxford Circus, he got up, dusted off his knees and casually left the carriage whistling to himself.

Meanwhile, I put my headphones back in, opened my book and could not wait to get home.


1 Comment

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One response to “Pirates of the Piccadilly

  1. Like the bit in Almost Famous when they all sing Elton John on the bus. EJ always brings people together.

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